How to Find the Perfect Man

The journey of how to find love is often fraught with answering personal questions like “how to find me a man” who perfectly fits my criteria – criteria that is often borrowed from the idea of a perfect man projected by mainstream media. Finding a soulmate that way is often not a good idea because in real-world dating scene, characteristics that we desire are not lumped in one person; rather, they are found in a broad spectrum of personalities.

The same standards of beauty that magazines and movies portray reshape our ideals of who is perfect to the point that we often see a man’s shortcomings instead of his positive qualities. We may not be keen to admit it, but the search for finding a soulmate often starts on the wrong foot: the minute we get interested with a man, the next concern is finding fault. Make an effort to banish this habit from your social skills the moment you catch yourself doing this. You will most likely catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. This applies to every relationship you forge, and not just in the process of how to find love.

Screening “candidates” is very much similar to interviewing applicants for a job. Highlight qualities that complement with your own (in the same way you would look for qualities that will contribute to the company’s bottom line) or attributes that you know you will be comfortable with. The next challenge is when you are faced with the dilemma to choose between a good quality (that you so desire) and a bad one (that you cannot abide by) that are both found in one man. To answer that, ask yourself whether you can put up with the negative long enough to sustain the relationship. Chances are, you will probably not make a good fit for the long haul if the answer is no.

Go with your gut if you doubt your judgment. The best way to do it is to know the person better. You are in a better position to gauge a man’s character when you see how he behaves in various circumstances and occasions, which is only possible when you have allowed the relationship to go beyond casual. The process of how to find the guy for you takes time, but your effort will be worth the wait. You also need to take calculated risks. The relationship may not progress beyond what you hoped for, or the man may turn out totally not in your league. Accept that fact, and move on.

In the process of looking for Mr. Right, you also need to make yourself the man’s Ms. Right. This requires self-discovery and honest self-reflection. The moment you understand who you really are at the core, you also get enlightened with the kind of man who is perfect for you. The challenge of how to find love often starts with not knowing the kind of man you want to take as a partner for life. Knowing yourself, therefore, also leads to knowing the ideal person you will be most happy with.

Enjoy the search and the goodluck! Use these tips to leverage on how to find a man. You can get more information on how you can find love by visiting Be sure to take advantage of the 6 Day Free E-mail Mini-Course.

Lori Abela is a Law of Attraction Practitioner and Finding True Love Coach for expatriates. She herself has manifested her match in 30 days through a process that she now teaches. Discover her secrets to finding true love by visiting Lori is available for coaching, speaking engagements and consultancy.

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